How do I deal with Impostor Syndrome?

It sounds like your self confidence is a bit low. Whether someone is good or not at a type of engineering won't have anything to do with being a girl but it isn't for everyone and that's fine. Equally, there are very few things that you can't get better at with determination and hard work.

I'd focus on trying your best with the subject and then also reading up on ways to build your belief in yourself. You could try keeping a journal just listing 3 small wins or things you're proud of yourself for each day for a month and see if that changes your perspective. There are some great books out there too like Grit and often the authors have done TED Talks you can watch for free online. Also sometimes it helps to imagine what you'd say if your closest friend came to you with an equivalent problem.

No one person knows everything, and nobody is expected to know everything. There are Subject Matter Experts in every field and profession. It takes a long time, but these people dedicate their time to learning something very specific, and become a resource for others. No one person can or will know everything and if you realize this and learn your strengths and the strengths of others you will become part of a team that helps each other in the best way possible.

If you make a mistake, acknowledge it, own it, learn from it and move on! Everyone who is anybody has and will continue to make mistakes. It is how you overcome and learn that makes you a success!

Please envision yourself as a success in your mind. Speak to yourself, tell yourself “you're the BEST.” Positive words of how amazing you are, how great of a job you did, how accomplished and proud you are of the job you did.

You are looking at this question all wrong. Turn this into a positive. Self doubt and insecurity that you will get something wrong is a humbling trait to have in the engineering world. You have millions of peoples lives in your hands, it is good to have self doubt.

Engineers can not be overconfident, as it can lead to disastrous results.

Think about it as a software or systems engineer you overlook a small factor. It could bring down major corporations, disrupt financial markets, or cause a scientist not to see a new deadly organism.

Building Engineers have to stress test for geographical phenomenon, or a building could collapse harming many individuals.

Electrical and Telecommunication Engineers have our everyday lives in their hands. Look at what a hurricane, tornado, or flood does to disrupt our lives when electricity and communications are down.

So no matter what kind of engineer you choose to be it is good to doubt yourself. Take a 2nd and 3rd look at the solution. Run test scenarios and proof of concept drills.

Don't let other people's opinions transform your goals. Imposter syndrome is important to an engineer, just don't let it consume you to the point of inaction.

It is easy to say "You are not an imposter." However engineering to me is an art, every brain tackles a problem from a different angle. Thus it is VERY important that you follow your dreams. Engineering isn't meant to be for one gender or one brain type over another. The very "art" of engineering is that problem solving needs to come from EVERY person, gender, creed and perspective. It is important that all walks of life contribute to engineering, that is where we all come together, and where brilliance comes from. Thus, there is never an "imposter" in engineering, the profession needs all of us.

First thing you need to focus on is trying to identify where you need some extra help, it has nothing to do with being a boy or a girl.

Many times you will find a specific subject/topic that you need some extra help understanding, but once you get some help and understand the concept, the next steps come easier. Many times it is all about looking at the challenge in a different way than you have been trying to solve the challenge. Most teachers are more than happy to answer or help guide you when you are engaged and ask questions. They will see your enthusiasm to learn, and help where they can.

When you are looking for help, be prepared to tell them where you are having challenges, what you have already done, what you are thinking of doing - that helps them understand your thought process, and guide you to what you can try next.

Remember, it has nothing to do with being a girl!!

You are not alone. Engineering courses can be hard and it can be important to find support, both academically and socially. I remember feeling like I didn't know anything when I was learning engineering concepts and it was only after I reached out to get help, that I realized that many others were struggling too. I found that study groups helped as well as talking to my teachers. Above all, believe in yourself.

To manage imposter syndrome, I surround myself with a supportive set of friends, practice positive self-talk, use uplifting affirmations, and keep a record of my successes to reflect upon when I'm feeling down. It's like building a shield against imposter syndrome! Additionally, it always helps to have another outlet away from the scenario causing imposter syndrome. For example, spending time reading, doing arts and crafts, or participating in sports can help get your mind off the things causing you stress.

This is a great question. It is not easy. As you go through your career, if you have a set of values and goals that you keep focused on, then what the rest of the world is thinking about you has to take second place. Making mistakes and even failing is critical to learning. If others see any mistake you might make differently, then that is their problem not yours. That is easy to say, and hard to build a mindset around, but you can do it!

We all need help at times. Others may not be getting as good of grades but aren't as worried about it, or they have someone in their network who can help them when they have questions. It's important for you to grasp the concepts, so please try to celebrate the initiative you are taking to truly understand the concepts.

Also, your lack of understanding is NOT because you are a girl, but your lack of confidence might be! It's hard to shake a lifetime of hearing that boys are better at math, etc. There may be times when you need to try harder than those around you. If this is what you want, embrace that! This section might be hard and the next might be much clearer to you. Wishing you confidence and success!

Some advice on overcoming imposter syndrome. I know it can be tough feeling like you're pretending to be someone you're not, but I truly believe that thinking big can help shift your mindset. Instead of focusing on your doubts and insecurities, try to envision the possibilities that come with embracing your talents and capabilities. Remind yourself of your accomplishments and the unique skills that you bring to the table. By thinking big and believing in yourself, you can start to break free from the limitations of imposter syndrome.

Remember, no one is born knowing everything. By high school, everybody has had different experiences and will bring that to every team. It's easy to say “don't be afraid to ask,” but that is really the key. I've found that once I start asking what I feel might be basic questions, then others start asking too, and even want to be on my team because they feel more open to learn and ask. Those teams get SO strong because no one is afraid to learn and fail and learn again.

When I feel like you described, I just keep telling myself that everyone else in the room had to learn sometime, and this is my time. If I get that judged feeling, I will ask those people how they learned X or Y. It really opens more doors and puts you in a better spot, but you have to do it a few times to convince yourself and see the great results. You've got this!

Almost anyone can feel lost or unsure when starting something new. These feelings can affect anyone, from students to accomplished professionals, regardless of their skill level, experience, or background.

Recognize that self-criticism is natural but isn’t necessarily accurate. This is something I struggle with almost every day and I’m an Engineering Manager with 30 years of engineering experience. When you catch yourself thinking, “I’m only getting help because I’m behind,” try reframing that as, “I’m getting help because I’m learning, just like everyone else.” Look at asking for help as a strength rather than a weakness.

There’s this skill that I have learnt called “Building Mastery.” The idea is to set small goals that will let you see your progress while taking small step after small step in order to reach your end goal. For instance, if a project seems overwhelming, break it down into pieces and work on mastering one skill, one item at a time. Every skill you develop, no matter how small it seems, is a building block. Celebrate each win, like understanding a concept or finishing part of a project, as it shows you’re moving forward!

The idea is to build your self-confidence, manage any self-doubt, and take ownership of the achievements you most certainly are making in your robotics course.

Here are a few life lessons that can help you reduce stress and live a happy life.

1. Everyone feels like an impostor sometimes. Every single person. It is a perfectly normal feeling since we don't know everything. You will never know everything. And that is ok.

2. People aren't thinking about you as much as you think they are. People are caught up in their own lives. Don't waste time worrying about what people are thinking of you because they are probably not thinking of you. And that is ok, too.

3. Asking for help is awesome! People appreciate it when we try. If you are trying, they are likely willing to give you extra help. This is not a failure. Asking for help is a superpower.

4.We ALL make mistakes. Mistakes are how we learn what works and what doesn't. What matters is what you do after you make a mistake. Take responsibility, make it right, and move on.

I do not think that feeling of being insecure will ever go away once you are challenging yourself to be better than where you are. Since as long as you are going beyond where you are, there is that sense of trepidation, of wonder and of excitement… you are in unknown territory after all.

You do not need to worry about anyone else’s journey but just follow your path. Do what you love and take time to enjoy the experiences. There will be some things that are easy at first and some things that are not; there are other things that are hard at first but become easier the more you do it; some things take a bit longer than others for you, and that is all OK. Everyone is like that. But you have to learn to enjoy the good times and the not-so-good times. These are all learning opportunities so that we can become better at what we do.

You can be assured, with absolutely no doubt, that it is not because you are a girl that you are experiencing any perceived challenges. When we learn to embrace our challenges, we learn to overcome them as we do not see them as obstacles but opportunities to become better at what we do.

I partnered with the USPTO who did an interview-turned-article with me on this topic which you might find helpful! You can read the article here.

This is a really tough question and, if it helps, you are not alone. I am a successful CEO and am also called on to serve on some very high level advisory boards and I will share with you that often, when I walk into a room and see the others who are participating, I have the same feeling – why am “I” here?

Many, many years ago, when I was closer in age to you, I had the same reaction that you are describing when working with other boys in the class. It didn’t help that back then it was much more common for there to be very negative and sexist remarks to be thrown at female STEM students. The trick I still use to deal with this feeling is to go into a quiet room with a mirror, look at myself in the mirror and give myself a pep talk. It also helps to remember that it is much more important that you feel good about yourself and that you feel that you are doing your best than to worry about what others think about you. This really works!

The first thing I want to tell you is, “You are not alone.” Imposter syndrome, that all-encompassing fear that you will be exposed as a “fraud” or discovered to not have what it takes, is common. In fact, it is believed that up to 70% of people have experienced imposter syndrome at some point in their lives [1]. People who have imposter syndrome have a tendency to attribute accomplishments to external factors (e.g., luck or a helping hand) as opposed to internal factors (e.g., grit or effort)[1]. By the very nature of imposter syndrome, people typically do not share with others that they are having these thoughts, so those who are experiencing it often feel alone.

One of my favorite quotes is from John Maxwell: “The difference between average people and achieving people is their perception of and response to failure.”

Imposter syndrome is often experienced by people who are high achievers, by those who will “not settle into the ranks of mediocrity” [1]. This stems from the high expectation you set for yourself, and it is ok to set high standards for yourself but you also need to give yourself space to learn and grow. So how do you do this?

I felt a tremendous amount of imposter syndrome as I navigated college and graduate school without knowing it. After I became familiar with it, I was able to start recognizing the thought patterns I was having and taking action to interrupt them. Here are some of the key things I try to remind myself when I feel like an imposter:

1. “Own your successes. You didn’t get lucky by chance” [1]. As mentioned above, high achievers often attribute their success to external factors. This is especially common amongst women high achievers [1]. If you get a good grade – hang it on the refrigerator (or on your bulletin board, etc.) so that you can revisit it. I have some of my college assignments and notes of thank you and recognition from my professional career filed in my home office so I can refer to the things I accomplished whenever I need a “pick-me-up.” Revisit those positive reinforcements when needed. This helps you remember what you do well and recognize your expertise [2].
2. Do not compare yourself to others. I know this is extremely difficult, and I sometimes still catch myself doing it. Comparing ourselves to others requires us to compare the personal struggle that we know very deeply – those stumbles, trips and falls – to the greatest hits album of another person. What I mean by that is: we are often comparing ourselves to others’ resumes, which highlight their successes but not their struggles. One of my favorite exercises is to keep my own “resume of failures” [3], which highlights my stumbles that I get to look back upon when I have my wins. It is fun to see the journey that built me.
3. Talk it out with someone. I like to have my “Board of Directors” – that group of two or three trusted people I can openly share my feelings with and get recentered in reality. The people on your board may be family, friends, or trusted colleagues, but they should be people that you can be vulnerable with and you can get honest feedback from them to help you grow.

It is exhausting dealing with imposter syndrome as a student. I lived it and it was not emotionally or physically healthy for me, as it added unnecessary stress to an already stressful job of learning difficult subject matter. Remember, you are not alone. Extremely successful people often feel like an imposter at one point or another because what they are doing means a lot to them. Imposter syndrome is like a brushback pitch in baseball, but you can’t let it take you out of the game. My TEDx Talk was specifically focused in this area and geared toward high school students [4]. If you choose to watch it, I hope that it inspires you as you navigate your journey through school and toward a career.

References:
[1] M. Warrell, “Afraid of Being ‘Found Out?’ Overcome Imposter Syndrome,” Forbes, 2014, http://www.forbes.com/sites/margiewarrell/2014/04/03/impostor-syndrome/
[2] K. Weir, “Feel Like a Fraud?” American Psychological Association, 2013, http://www.apa.org/gradpsych/2013/11/fraud.aspx
[3] “CV of Failures Goes Viral: The Potholes of an Academic Career,” Princton Alumni Weekly, May 23, 2016, https://paw.princeton.edu/article/cv-failures-goes-viral
[4] K. Phillips, “Don’t Let the Brushback Pitch Take You Out of the Game,” TEDx Talks, December 12, 2017, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yppCPXSrjVc

I wish I had a magic answer on how to deal with imposter syndrome. I believe it will diminish for you as you continue to work hard and gain more experience and more confidence. But that may not offer much comfort to you right now!

What I can say is that many people experience it -- and not only girls, and not only young people, but even very senior and highly accomplished people. I was quite startled -- but secretly really happy -- to hear a very senior male colleague express it recently. Besides producing numerous research articles and numerous successful PhD students, he has written a highly-regarded and widely used textbook in our profession, and done many other amazing things. I never thought of him as being insecure, but he publicly acknowledged having imposter syndrome on the occasion of receiving a Lifetime Achievement Award from the foremost professional society in our field! I had admired him previously, but I admired him all the more for being willing to say so openly, and hoped that it encouraged others as it did me.

What I can suggest to you right now is: look beyond yourself a bit. It may seem like you are the only one needing and receiving extra help, but I strongly suspect that is not the case. You may not even see or know about the extra help that other people are receiving. And a lot of times, when you start looking for it, you see evidence of insecurity even in people who seem (on the outside) to have it all together. Some people are good at exhibiting more confidence than they really feel (and often, more than is actually justified), and with experience, you can often start to recognize such behaviors for what they are: defense mechanisms.

I hope this helps, and I hope you can focus on doing your best. Everyone makes mistakes (even your instructor; even your classmates), so the goal is not to be perfect, but to do our best, to acknowledge and learn from our mistakes, to try not to repeat them, and to try to make fewer mistakes over time. The rest will follow in due course.

It may help to hear from people who had similar experiences, so here's mine:

When I first started studying Electrical Engineering, I'd get anxious when I saw my male colleagues get their electronic circuits to work much faster than I did. On paper, I could design a circuit as good as theirs, but unlike my peers, I didn't know how to experiment to fix implementation problems. With time I learned that in the lab we weren't dealing with ideal components like those we encounter in books. For instance, an ideal resistor is a linear element: if you double the voltage, the current doubles, and vice-versa. In the real world, resistors don't always behave that way, and of course the male colleagues who had played with these components as kids had a much better instinct about how to "tweak" things to get the desired results.

Two decades later, after post-graduate studies in robotics, I started working on fun data science projects involving a lot of the engineering concepts I learned in school. I used machine learning to predict how good the WiFi signal would be for a cell phone operating in a given geographic location, how much natural gas would have to flow through a transmission pipeline to generate enough electricity for local businesses, etc. Meanwhile, many of my male colleagues were working on boring jobs unrelated to their EE background, and some of those were going back to school in hopes to get qualified to do the same work I was already doing.

So, to get rid of your impostor syndrome, first I think it helps to recognize that being a girl may indeed contribute to being a bit behind when we're just getting started in engineering. Generally speaking, young boys have more opportunities to play with "engineering toys" than girls – for example, they get more construction sets and mechanical puzzles as gifts. For that reason, in high school and college they tend to feel more comfortable with activities like soldering a circuit board or building a robot.

Second, practice caring less about what others think of you. Even if you *are* being watched (which is highly unlikely, as most people are too focused on themselves to pay attention to what others are doing), focus on your own progress rather than on gaining the approval of others. Remember this quote from Seth Godin: "We must be talented, powerful and resilient creatures indeed given how much we manage to produce despite the constant undercutting, ridicule and needless censorship we aim at ourselves."

Third, develop good strategies to learn more with less effort. Read the book How to Be a High School Superstar: A Revolutionary Plan to Get into College by Standing Out (Without Burning Out) by Cal Newport. And later, from the same author, How to Win at College: Surprising Secrets for Success from the Country's Top Students and How to Become a Straight-A Student: The Unconventional Strategies Real College Students Use to Score High While Studying Less to help you master the college system.

Learning the winning strategies of the top students will allow you to create more free time in your schedule to follow your passions and interests and start feeling that you, too, know what you're doing.

Good luck!

Recognize and acknowledge your feelings: Understand that imposter syndrome is a common experience and that many high-achieving individuals, including Maya Angelou and Einstein, have felt the same way. Gather accomplishment evidence: Collect tangible proofs of your achievements, such as awards, and positive feedback. Regularly revisit this collection to remind yourself of your capabilities and progress.
Replace negative thoughts: Challenge negative thoughts by replacing them with positive affirmations. For example, instead of thinking, "I am not good at anything," remind yourself of three things you are good at.
Seek support: Engage in mentoring circles or attend events that focus on overcoming imposter syndrome and building confidence.